Intro Okcupid
We think it's best when conversations are between people who are interested in each other. However, on OkCupid (unlike other sites) you have the opportunity to send an introduction to someone before they've liked you. This means when they first see you, they'll see your full profile and your introduction at the same time, which is a great way to pique their interest.
How to send that first introduction to someone:
1. Like them
- From Discover, drag their photo to the right or click the heart icon.
- From Questions, visit their profile, and click/tap the Like button to bring up the message button.
- If you Like each other, we'll always let both of you know for FREE right away.
Source: Blog.OkCupid.com. A typo or two is fine, but make sure your message is actually readable and not full of errors and embarrassing spelling faux pas. If you struggle with spelling, run your message through Google Doc’s spell check (It’s under the Tools tab). This extra 5 seconds of effort might make all the difference. According to OkCupid, “Saying ‘Hey’ in a first message is almost equivalent to saying nothing — this greeting has an 84% chance of being completely ignored.” That first exchange sets the tone for the rest of the relationship, so you should go beyond one-word openers and say something to give your date a laugh. The OkCupid system has changed. You no longer get access to a “conversation” with someone unless you both have “liked” each other. When you get notified that you received a message, if it's not under conversations, it means you have to go to the “. Once you send an introductory message to someone, we won't show them to you again on OkCupid until they like you back. Now the ball is in their court! If they like you, they'll let you know by liking you back or replying to your message. When that happens, you'll see the conversation show up in your 'Conversations' page and we'll send you a.
2. Visit their profile and send a message
To view the profiles that you've liked, who haven't liked you back yet, you can navigate to Likes > Matches > People you like (under the mutual matches section).
Once you've liked someone, you'll see a 'message' button on their profile. Click to compose an introductory message and send! Please note: You can only send one initial message, so make it a good one!
If the other person hasn't liked you yet, you won't see their profile (or your sent message) until they like you back. This is so you don't waste your time on people you've already reached out to.
3. Wait for their response
Once you've messaged someone, your intro will go to their Intros tab. We'll also add you to their Discover queue, and let them know you sent an Intro! We always make sure people who have sent Intros get moved towards the front of Discover.
The person you've reached out to can visit your profile to view the Intro you sent them, along with the rest of their profile.
If they're interested in you, they can Like you back. This will move your message to the 'conversations' page for both of you, so you can write to each other any time. You'll also get a notification that they wrote to you and Liked your profile.
Frequently Asked Questions
Do I HAVE to like someone to message them?
Intro Okcupid Youtube
Yes, you do have to Like someone to send them a message. We want conversations to be only between people who are interested in each other, so you have to Like someone before messaging them.
Please note that if someone messages you, and you’re not interested in them, there is no expectation on our end that you tell people that you’re not interested. You can just pass on the profile and move on. They will not be told that you Passed on their profile. They also will not see your profile again on the site, and you won't see them, so it won't be awkward.
If you’d prefer to tell someone in a message that you're not interested, that’s fine! But you would have to work within the messaging system, which means liking someone before messaging them.
I don't see the 'Intros' feature on my account, where is it?
Check out all-new SuperLikes here.
If you still need help, you can email a friendly human.
If I had to choose one method of modern online dating to forever marry myself to, I'll choose OkCupid every time. I've found more success on OkCupid than I have on any other site to date, and no, I promise that they haven't paid me to say that. Not only is it filled with attractive singles within a reasonable distance to me, I can find out more about those people than the simple one sentence bio you get on Tinder and other dating apps. OkCupid also has all of the benefits of a paid online dating site without the monthly subscription. And the real kicker? Most of the people on there actually want to date. So if you're looking for more than a hookup, this site is the place to be.
That being said, with greater dating site power comes greater responsibility, and you must use it wisely. OkCupid isn't the type of place you go if you want to swipe through for a relatively superficial match: It's a place that takes time and a bit of commitment to creating a good profile and hunting down prospective matches in order to be successful. The biggest mistake you can make is not taking advantage of OkCupid's compatibility features; unlike Tinder, OkCupid actually works to try and find someone you'll have something in common with. And with that in mind, here are the details on the OkCupid mistakes you should avoid making.
1. Not Taking The Time To Fill Out Your Profile
As I said, OKCupid is giving you a profile for a reason, so take the time to actually fill it out. You may believe that no one is reading it, but a lot of people do take the time to see what you've written. Not only will it help clue other people in to some of the specifics of who you are, it'll help attract people with similar interests. And it makes it easier for them to reach out to you.
2. Forgetting To Answer The Compatibility Questions
Don't ignore this feature— it's one of the major things that sets this site apart from others. It's really awesome that OkCupid has a series of compatibility questions, and taking the time to answer them helps you out tremendously when navigating the site. Based on those questions, OkCupid will show you a percentage rating on each of your prospective matches to clue you in to how similar the both of you are based on your respective answers. The questions will also tell you what values you have in common when you click on their page. As a result, you have better knowledge of who you'll vibe with later on, and who you're likely to want nothing to do with. Can't say the same for Tinder.
3. Not Downloading The App
From my own experience on OkCupid, the app is a lot easier to use, but still retains all of the most important aspects of the site. The app also makes it easier to browse potential matches, and for all of you who do love swiping, the app has that feature too.
4. Neglecting To Read Someone's Profiles
If someone writes it, they obviously want you to read it, so why not take a second to look? If you take a moment to read someone's OkCupid profile, you'll get a feeling for what they're looking for, which can save you the awkward conversation later on. Also, getting a feel for their personality may make them more attractive to you.
5. Not Taking Advantage Of The Like Feature
I have come to use the “Like” feature religiously on OkCupid because it helps establish if I'm a mutual match with someone before I send the initial message. On Tinder, you'll know someone's instantly attracted to you because they swiped right but on OkCupid, you're free to message whoever, so you don't know until you talk to them. That is, unless you both “Like” each other. It means less of a chance of getting shot down.
6. Not Using Someone's Profile As Material For Your First Message
Let's be real: Saying “hey” is boring, and probably won't get you very far when trying to get to know someone. If you read someone's profile and lead in with a question, or comment on it, you'll immediately launch into a more natural, interesting conversation.
7. Ignoring The Compatibility Percentages
Okcupid Intro Message
As hot as that one guy or girl mountain biking in his default pic might be to you, you should probably take the “14 percent match” into consideration before messaging them. When someone has a low compatibility percentage and a high enemy percentage, it's because you have little things in common. And, you probably disagree on some serious issues that are very important to you. My advice? Take those percentages seriously.
8. Only Putting Up One Profile Pic
I think this should be the Golden Rule of all dating apps and profiles. If you only have one picture of yourself, it makes someone less likely to actually pursue you because a) they don't have a good idea of what you look like, b) it gives off a sense of low confidence, and c) it looks like you're not putting in any effort. It sounds weird, but people can take subtle cues from someone's profile to gauge their temperament in real life, and if you're only posting one pic, you might seem a little shy or like you're trying to hide something. The more transparency, the better, especially if you're looking to meet up eventually.
9. Not Checking Who Viewed Your Profile
What's cool about OkCupid is you have the opportunity to see who is creeping on your profile before you say anything. If you looked at someone's page, and they looked at your back, there's a chance they might be interested. Also, it can clue you into prospective matches you haven't found when browsing.
My Self Summary Okcupid Example
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